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  • Sole Survivor

    Sole Survivor

    ★★★★½

    Cozy horror. Beautifully photographed, extremely atmospheric, and very spooky. Near perfect tbh

  • Noises Off...

    Noises Off...

    ★★★★

    Unironically more stressful than UNCUT GEMS.


    Very obviously an adaptation of a play in that in terms of cinematography this is very much "set the camera down, get everything we need in frame, and start recording", but goddamn, this might have some of the most excellent blocking I have ever seen in a film. I love the fluid, clockwork motion, clearly rehearsed to death but appearing completely natural and goddamned hilarious. I can't single out a single performance as the…

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  • Ready Player One

    Ready Player One

    (This movie definitely has a huge audience. I am not it.)

    The perfect movie for Deadpool shirt-wearing, Rick and Morty quoting, all-night gaming, Hot Topic shopping, Mountain Dew chugging, reddit commenting, 30 year old virgin Nice Guys ™ who immediately send friend requests to female gamers when they encounter them and then go to wonder why girls never like Nice Guys™ like them. It's a movie for the gatekeepers, the guys who scoff at people whenever they misquote a Star…

  • mother!

    mother!

    ★★★★★

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    mfw Darren Aronofksy low-key remade Begotten and tricked the normies into seeing it by casting Jennifer Lawrence, Javier Bardem, Michelle Pfeiffer, and Ed Harris.

    Look, I absolutely cannot begin to unpack this film right now. I can safely say a film has never made me feel the way this film has made me feel, and I am not a talented enough writer to express these feelings in a coherent manner.

    I saw all of the marketing describing this film as…