• Gone in the Night

    Gone in the Night

    Okay…but what’s the point and why should I care? This is the most half-baked movie I’ve seen in a long time. The pacing is seemingly non-existant until an ending that manages to go fully off-the-rails and still feel unbearably lifeless. It it goes from the most comatose thriller to the worst X-Files episode you’ve ever seen. Winona looks rightfully lost the entire movie.

  • Prey

    Prey

    ★★★½

    As someone with no Predator experience, this is solid, visceral and beautifully shot. Trachtenberg does everything he set out to do successfully for the most part and the Comanche angle is welcomed, but I also don’t think anything about this is particularly next-level and most of the acting/animal CGI is not great. Admittedly I’m not huge on survival movies, and this doesn’t do much to change that as the narrative isn’t all that gripping, but it functions decently enough. Midthunder carries the movie well. I do wish I would’ve watched the Comanche dub, as that might’ve enhanced the experience.

  • Not Okay

    Not Okay

    ★★½

    At this point, everything that can be said about social media and influencer culture has already been said. This aims to take a darkly comedic approach, but that comedy is at best mediocre. It’s interesting that this film suggests she doesn’t get a redemption arc, but she kinda does? This movie never doesn’t lend her a sympathetic ear. A film with more bite would acknowledge that she doesn’t necessarily deserve a resolute ending that offers closure. She is borderline sociopathic and…

  • Lightyear

    Lightyear

    ★★½

    The biggest problem with this is how utterly futile and insignificant it is. You can find this in every space adventure ever. Nothing makes it distinctly Buzz Lightyear. And as good as the animation is, it doesn’t feel visually inspired and in many moments is derivative of much better space adventures. It’s essentially Star Wars lite. I have a hard time believing this would’ve inspired a toy line or Andy’s interest.

  • They/Them

    They/Them

    This movie is incompetent as both slasher and a comment on the LGBTQIA+ experience. When they broke out and started unironically singing “Fuckin’ Perfect,” I was done. I’m not here for this homophobia.

  • The X Files: I Want to Believe

    The X Files: I Want to Believe

    ★½

    Hey, do you remember when Chris Carter implied that pedophilia might be forgivable if one tried hard enough? Or when he made an X-File about a pedophile priest having visions of one of his victims, who’s now a gay man harvesting organs for his husband? Or how he seemingly doesn’t understand the characters or universe or themes he cultivated? I want to believe I didn’t.

  • The Young Girls of Rochefort

    The Young Girls of Rochefort

    ★★★★★

    Fated love, chance encounters, vibrant colors, perfectly color-coordinated outfits, immaculate hats, gorgeous musical swells, jazzy musical choreography….and a completely random subplot about a murder. That’s Rochefort.

  • The Gray Man

    The Gray Man

    ★½

    Not grayte, man. The Russo Brothers need to be held accountable for all those dumbass drone shots. I couldn't even remember earlier scenes as I was watching this - that’s how dull and forgettable this is. I’ve never seen Gosling phone it in so hard and, shocker, De Armas is wasted. Go back to the MCU, Russo’s. This might just be the ugliest and most forgettable $200 million action movie with a hot cast that’s ever existed.

  • Mean Girls

    Mean Girls

    ★★★★★

    Rachel McAdams deserved an Oscar and all the awards for this. I’m convinced she is Regina George. It’s one of the greatest performances of all-time. I really mean it.

  • Nope

    Nope

    ★★★★

    Spielberg with a touch of David Lynch, but still undeniably Jordan Peele. It's difficult not to admire his ambitions because of the exceptional craft and spectacle on display. We don’t get many mainstream films that play with conventions and originality, so I’m gonna let some of the more underdeveloped  stuff slide (ie, Gordy). And, honestly, I really loved that stuff and Yeun is the highlight for me, so I’m not even gonna knock Peele for it. It just needed a little…

  • Sinister

    Sinister

    ★★½

    Honestly, the movie is okay if generic and reliant on jump scares/spooky videos up until the last 10 minutes, which I think is one of the lamest endings to any horror movie ever. The more this movie explains things, the dumber it gets. The walking into a movie at the end is goofy and desperate in its attempt to be creepy. Not to mention, the makeup department budget shows hard with the possessed children. Should've just ended with him discovering the tapes at the new house. That’s a much more effective ending.

  • The Requin

    The Requin

    ½

    Y’all, if you don’t have the budget or the actors  to pull off a survival movie, don’t do it. This has some of the worst green screen work I’ve ever seen, and that’s really not helped by the CGI or whatever the hell Silverstone is doing.