Alex Bernard

Alex Bernard

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All opinions listed here are good and correct.

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  • Love & Friendship

    Love & Friendship

    ★★★½

    Prime baby!

    Mom wanted to watch, asked me to pause twice in the first 30 seconds so she could tell me something, and then fell asleep in the first five minutes.

    “Sir James is no Solomon.”

  • Tesla

    Tesla

    ★½

    Hulu while texting!

    “Is nature a gigantic cat?”

    This film is baffling.

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  • The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian

    The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    Disney Plus...

    A few things. 

    #1

    “Things never happen the same way twice.”
    ...is a line in this movie that’s REPEATED TWICE

    #2
    I could go on and on about how the movie has no central morality and how the main character’s choices cost thousands of Narnian/human lives and how these four young members of the British ruling class are responsible for two wars and the extermination of countless ancient bloodlines....but...

    # 3!!!!!
    [spoiler?]
    This movie ends with Regina Spektor’s…

  • Short Cuts

    Short Cuts

    ★★★★★

    Cassie’s DVD!

    “Oh Pat what’re you looking at? It’s nothing new. Have a nice day.”

    AND

    “Well, Marian, we have guests coming. And I’m gonna go and light the barbecue.”

    An overwhelming meditation on jealousy, abuse, and storytelling. Everybody’s got their makes and breaks. People are just okay until they’re not and they’re not okay until they’re just okay again. Masterpiece.

    All movies continue to be good.