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  • Crazy Rich Asians

    Crazy Rich Asians

    ★★★★

    I'm happy to report that movies can be fun.

    It takes a bit too long to find its rhythm, but Crazy Rich Asians is a really fun watch. I felt genuinely invested in the main characters, and even when their individual subplots felt a bit contrived, somehow the emotional resolution still hit for me because of how sweet the whole thing was. Constance Wu, in particular, is just a wonder to watch on screen, and even her slowest scenes felt…

  • The Meg

    The Meg

    ★★★

    Less goofy and action-packed than I imagined, but still a decently fun blockbuster with some tense sequences. While not particularly original in their roles, the characters were all interesting enough that I was able to properly root for them. The humor throughout kept this moving, and surprisingly, the almost two-hour runtime felt much quicker than it was. I'm always gonna love watching big creatures wreck havoc, and this was no exception.

    I was really hoping there was gonna be like a hundred of these big boys. I wanted a war.

    Rating: 56/100

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  • Twin Peaks

    Twin Peaks

    ★★½

    me, running as fast as i can: "i appreciate your style, i just don't get it! please, leave me alone!"
    david lynch, galloping after me and playing a trumpet: "negativity is the enemy of creativity"

  • The Emoji Movie

    The Emoji Movie

    It's nearly impossible to review this film without writing about the sex scenes, and that's part of the problem. In depicting the intensity of first love, it's reasonable to present sex with a similar intensity, yet the duration and graphic nature of the sex scenes is so great that they pull focus from the rest of the narrative. Additionally, these scenes do nothing to propel the narrative forward, resulting in an uncomfortable, albeit arousing, stagnation. For a film that's already…