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  • Deep Impact

    Deep Impact

    ★★★

    Morgan Freeman starts his national address about the end of the world with “Hello, America!”. This film is buck fucking wild.

  • Grosse Pointe Blank

    Grosse Pointe Blank

    ★★★★

    Lost half a star for the anti-union sentiment, and another for every character pronouncing Oregon “orygone”. Otherwise flawless.

  • Say Anything...

    Say Anything...

    Look at the road while you're driving goddammit!

  • Baby Driver

    Baby Driver

    ★★★½

    So much of what is great about this film is completely undone in the last 5 minutes. The little story, character development, and few clever ideas that wrap what is essentially just Edgar Wright Directs Shoot Outs And Car Chases get completely torn apart, and ruins what would have otherwise been a perfectly fun action movie.

    Stop when Baby and Debora hit the road, and pretend that was it.

  • The Room

    The Room

    ½

    I have never had more fun watching a film before in my life.

  • Concussion

    Concussion

    ★★½

    The quality of Will Smith’s acting—juxtaposed with bad writing, a clumsy narrative, awkward, inconsistent cinematography, and some real lackluster supporting performances—made this all the harder to enjoy.

    It just didn’t find its story, and it seemed so obvious given the subject matter that it would. Deserved to be a hell of a lot better than it was.

  • Dear Zachary: A Letter to a Son About His Father

    Dear Zachary: A Letter to a Son About His Father

    ★★★★★

    Utterly devastating. I can never ever watch this ever again.

  • A League of Their Own

    A League of Their Own

    ★★★★★

    This may be the most perfect film ever made. Is there a better film than this? The answer is no, no there is not.

  • L.A. Confidential

    L.A. Confidential

    ★★½

    James Cromwell's Irish accent. Oof.

  • Nymphomaniac: Vol. I

    Nymphomaniac: Vol. I

    ½

    This film is a practical joke, right? Horrifically written, overacted, directionless, two-dimensional nonsense.

    The only time I’ve ever watched something on a recommendation from a friend, and felt upset enough to post a review. The friend got a stern telling off too. Just, ugh. Awful.