Midsommar ★★★★

This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

This review may contain spoilers.

this legitimately took me over a week to gather my thoughts on just because the main thing i was left with once it was over was "????". i remember sitting in the theater as it emptied and my boyfriend asking me if i was sad, because i looked uneasy - fantastic date movie, by the way - and in a way i was? but also a little bit joyful?

i wish the characters were a bit more developed, overall, and at first i was left a little bit disappointed that this just didn't mess me up like hereditary did, but while the former point feels fair, the latter is more about my own expectations and what personally terrifies me more than anything else. and at the end of the day, as depraved and fucked up it is, watching dani's journey through grief and a shitty relationship into a family that embraced her and deeply empathized her moved me in a way that wasn't entirely negative, as horrible as the whole set up was.

speaking of dani, florence pugh's performance left me floored - even though her character was more one note than i would have liked, her wailing at the beginning shook me, deeply, and brought me to tears in the opening of the movie more than once. i tried watching this a week earlier but had to leave the theater due to an emergency, and still, even knowing what it had in store for me, i couldn't help but to feel all of the despair she felt in that moment.

i'm also in love with how the movie was edited and shot - particularly the mirror shots and the cuts between dani's panic attacks which feel a little bit too real if you're anywhere near familiar with those. it's gorgeous, and the nature shots are incredible, and i appreciate the tie between nature and horror that reminds me a little bit of what we've seen in annihilation. though garland's take focuses more on what is bizarre and unnatural, and aster just shines an uncomfortable light on something that is entirely primal, both shine an appreciation on what they show, even when it is absolutely terrible.

overall, i did want this movie to disturb me more, i think - strangely enough i wanted to feel more negative emotion associated with it, but i understand it's a different experience for everyone involved, and mostly i can't wait to see the director's cut. 100% worth the wait.