Beach Episode

Coconut-scented pretty-boy.
Logging as of 2019 onwards.

Favorite films

  • The Iceman Cometh
  • Stop Making Sense
  • The Wages of Fear
  • Mandy

Recent activity

  • Cyberpunk: Edgerunners


  • Fly! Peek the Whale


  • Sun - A Film without a Camera


  • Limbo


Pinned reviews

  • The King's Speech

    The King's Speech

    Historically, King George stuttered so much because he was trying incredibly hard not to accidentally admit he fucks dogs.
    Unforgivably ugly, as all monarchist propaganda is. Pretty interesting how the only colours in its palette are different hues of shoe polish...? 👢👅

  • The Hairy Ape

    The Hairy Ape


    Welcome to the USS Hepatitis, don't touch the rails or the walls or surfaces. The women on this ship are here to ruin the vibes. In this rusty coffin, we drink and shovel coal until we're 65. What do you mean 'learn to code', it's 1944, and I am the titular Hairy Ape.
    Hell is real because humans can create hell. Imagine what hell a more intelligent creature could create.

Recent reviews

  • Elvis



    I greatly appreciate the energy that Baz Luhrmann seems to keep bringing to the silva screen - dude was spinning in his director's chair like the Tasmanian Devil with this one. Kind of hated the movie but loved the experience, would recommend as a puzzlebox of utterly bizarre decisions in a package that is fast and energetic enough to instantly kill whoever is old enough actually to give a shit about Elvis.

  • Bronson



    society made him a monster (bald)

Popular reviews

  • Jeffrey Epstein: Filthy Rich

    Jeffrey Epstein: Filthy Rich

    I've come to expect moral irresponsibility from Netflix documentaries. They think we're fucking idiots, they're laughing at you behind snappy editing that makes the stories of abuse survivors come across as an exciting tabloid fluff piece. Epstein's such a weirdo! Here's middlebrow interviews with the people that protected and helped sustain the sick cabal. HE'S the bad egg, here.
    Impossible to believe. These rich monsters only made this documentary to clear their name. Whitewashing the bigger picture and pinning it all on the fall guy. Makes me sick beyond belief.

  • Hillary


    Inside the Mind of a Killer.
    A cryptkeeper in her mid 300's that simply refuses to drop the Mean Girls shit.