The Hours

The Hours ★★★★½

“Someone has to die in order that the rest of us should value life more. It's contrast.”

I cannot put into words what I feel right now. there’s this weird sensation that has overcome me, and I feel this deep pain in my chest. I am on the brink of tears. I itch to watch this film again, right now, this very moment — and the credits aren’t even done. this is a powerful movie, and it has left me overwhelmed. it has left me broken.

just a little over a day ago, my roommate attempted taking his life. I did not see him. all I saw was blood — lots of it. the walls, stairs, bathroom, door; everything was consumed with the harrowing smell of blood. when I saw him in the hospital, I was short of words. we’re not even that close. but it made me appreciate my life, despite how dreadful it feels to live it.

I did not know what The Hours was about. I did not know its subject matter. I watched it because I was in the mood for a Nicole Kidman performance. but that’s not all I got. I got a tragedy that’s made me reflective. when Laura Brown awakens in the hotel room, it made me realize that choice is a beautiful thing to have. she chose life, even though everyone hated her for it. but no one cared for the fact that she was already dying in the life she was living.

every now and then, I find myself feeling like Virginia Woolf. every now and then, I find myself considering how appealing death is (or may seem). and despite the fact that my roommate is the most jovial individual I have ever met, in that moment of weakness, death might’ve seemed like the only option for him. but we’ve been granted with the gift of choice. there’s always hope, and I’m thankful that he’s alive. life may not be beautiful, but there’s happiness in every moment, even if we cannot immediately see it.

I am thankful for choice. I am thankful for life. and I hope to choose life, now and forever. to anyone reading this, I hope you make the same choice too.

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