17 and brain damaged!
Chronic Hugh Grant Obession

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Recent reviews

  • Rubber's Lover

    Rubber's Lover


    It’s Tetsuo's distant BDSM obsessed cousin!
    It’s the lost Nine Inch Nails music video! 
    It’s Rubber’s lover!
    Let’s all thank Japan for the memories!
    I can’t say I was enjoying myself here, I also can’t say I really fully appreciated the film. I’m all for the grimy, ultra-violent, tech infused murder fest thingy, but when it’s this all over the place? I just tend to zone out. 
    Which may sound insane, considering how vibrant the visuals are. Considering how totally unprepared I…

  • The Atomic Cafe

    The Atomic Cafe


    A good old atomic tango, almost 90 minutes of relentless fear mongering and propaganda. Great film to show on a first date, trust me I would know. 
    Moral of the story? America loves its weapons. Big fucking surprise. America also really digs a lengthy power trip. What major country doesn’t? 
    Also ducking in a street corner will not save you from being eviscerated by an A Bomb. I would advise investing in a reinforced bunker, stocked to the brink with cans of Spam. Make sure to pack a Bible!

Popular reviews

  • Lost in Translation

    Lost in Translation


    You ever just see a film that feels like an actual personal attack? Or at least resonates so glaringly with your actual life?
    Well for me it’s definitely this film, this one especially hurt. Sofia Coppola battered up my feelings with a crowbar. 
    Lost In Translation is nothing spectacular, not much actually goes on. If you’re someone who hates films where it’s almost 100 percent talking, or staring blankly out on cityscapes, then oh no champ, I have some really bad…

  • There Will Be Blood

    There Will Be Blood


    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    Imagine, you finally get to go bowling with Daniel Day Lewis. All is fine, until he begins to drink straight vodka and eat cold steak. He then begins to mumble incomprehensibly about milkshakes, whilst hobbling around like Ebenezer Scrooge. Before you know it a bowling pin is being beamed at your head, your skull caves in. Blood, blood, everywhere. 
    You die, but at least it was Daniel Day Lewis who killed you. Maybe he’ll win another award for it?