There are no bad actors—only bad writing, bad direction and bad casting.

Favorite films

  • Ishtar
  • Inherent Vice
  • Casablanca
  • Wild at Heart

Recent activity

  • Decalogue II


  • The Death of Louis XIV


  • I Want You Back

  • The Thing


Recent reviews

  • The Death of Louis XIV

    The Death of Louis XIV


    Possibly actually the slowest, most boring movie I’ve ever seen, but really well made. Peter Greenaway on elephant tranquilizers. Art direction, costumes, makeup, photography and casting are 100/100.

    And it does what it says on the label. If you’re expecting something other than literally watching Louis XIV dying, for two full hours… you’re gonna have a bad time.

  • I Want You Back

    I Want You Back

    Michael Haneke did the vertical Instagram video on a big screen thing—although now that I say that I realize this was probably never shown on one—infinitely better in Happy End (2017).

    Dogshit “comedy,” with absolute dogshit writing and zero romantic or sexual chemistry between any two people in it. Just more Wellbutrin content slop for the desensitized content-consumer masses.

Popular reviews

  • Glass Onion

    Glass Onion


    I hate Elon Musk more than almost anyone—and I thought Knives Out was entertaining if a bit overhyped—but this was cretinous.

    Netflix movies aren’t real movies.

  • Nope



    A disclaimer. Art is subjective (obvious, well-worn point but occasionally bears repeating) and, slightly more nuanced point here, meaning can be found in literally anything. Anything you or anyone else personally got out of this movie, that’s honestly great. But movies, creative works in general, at the risk of making another overly obvious statement, can also convey a director/creator’s intended meaning. They don’t have to to be good or entertaining or for one to personally get something out of them, but…