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  • The Beach

    The Beach

    ★½

    Is this The Revenant

  • Cabaret

    Cabaret

    ★★★★★

    Michael York sit on my face

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  • The Wife

    The Wife

    ★★½

    MAYBE if you had a writing career THAT YOU WERE PASSIONATE ABOUT, then you would have a writing career actually worthy of the Nobel Peace Prize, but you DON’T.

  • Crazy Rich Asians

    Crazy Rich Asians

    ★★★★½

    Michelle Yeoh step on my neck tell me I’m worthless