• The Croods: A New Age

    The Croods: A New Age

    ★★★½

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    Don’t wanna say much but all I can say is that I love the scenes where Grug has an obsession with bananas dangling before him, Grug undresses Phil Betterman, and Grug and Phil stripped down and called them selves the “Bannan Bros”. Funny stu-

    Wait. We’re they confirming Grug is actually gay?... Awesome.

    Ultimate Grug Moment!

  • The Boss Baby: Family Business

    The Boss Baby: Family Business

    ★★★★★

    Who’s up for giving this 5 stars no matter how bad this ends up being?m

    We must finish what smallpaul started.

    Yes, all those serious reviewers will be pissed, and they have the right to be pissed, but I know I’ll be giving this 5 stars when it comes out so I apologize to those of you who use this website correctly.

  • Toy Story 2

    Toy Story 2

    ★★★★½

    Woody never closed the little suitcase window trap door thing in the bottom of the plane.

    I'm no airplane expert but I'm pretty sure that caused tons of personal objects and clothing to effectively become lost and may have even caused the airplane to land immediately.

  • Follow That Bird

    Follow That Bird

    ★★★

    It's amazing how much more emotion Big Bird, a fake human-operated six-year-old puppet bird, gives off than the literal human 45th president of the United States of America.

  • Impractical Jokers: The Movie

    Impractical Jokers: The Movie

    ★★★

    The Kings of Staten Island (2020)

  • If Anything Happens I Love You

    If Anything Happens I Love You

    ★★★★½

    I've had enough of Letterboxd, TMDB, IMDb, and Rotten Tomatoes.

    ANIMATION IS NOT A GENRE.

    I'm tired of seeing films labeled with the "genre", "Animation".

    It's not a genre.

    In the words of the great Brad Bird;

    "People think of animation only doing things where people are dancing around and doing a lot of histrionics, but animation is not a genre. And people keep saying "the animation genre", it's not a genre. A western is a genre, animation is an…

  • Toy Story

    Toy Story

    *trump supporters seeing trump outside the white house*

    Trump Supporters: Trump? What are you doing out of the white house?

    Trump: Uh nothin'. Uh' nothin. I'm sure America was just a little excited, that's all. Too much voter fraud and false voting, I suppose. It's just a mistake!

    Anybody with a brain: Well, that mistake is sitting in your spot, Trump. (CHUCKLES)

    Trump Supporters: (GASP) Have you been replaced?

    Trump: What did I tell you earlier? No one is getting…

  • Tin Toy

    Tin Toy

    ★★½

    I wonder if the now grown up man who provided the baby’s gibberish was ever made aware that he was in this.

  • Toy Story

    Toy Story

    ★★★½

    Genuine question: Do you wish that Toy Story 2, 3, and 4 kept the tradition of having little Randy Newman songs pop up for scenes like “Strange Things” and “I Will Go Sailing No More”?

  • Jungle Cruise

    Jungle Cruise

    Watch as Disney makes a Finding Nemo Submarine Voyage movie and only realize the ride was based on a movie until after they made the whole film and just drop it in theatres anyway.

  • Dolittle

    Dolittle

    God as my witness, I will eat an apple every day to keep this doctor away.

  • Grumpy Old Men

    Grumpy Old Men

    ★★★½

    The War with Grandpas (1993, pre-reboot of the 2020 money maker classic)