• Class of Nuke 'Em High

    Class of Nuke 'Em High

    ★★★★★

    It was fun to get to program this ridiculous mess of a movie for a theater even if I don't think everyone dug it quite as much as they'd hoped. Starts strong, ends strong, drags in the middle, not my favorite Kaufman jam, but I still love it nonetheless even though a few moments (pulling out an assault rifle in the principal's office) that once seemed far-fetched and ridiculous now just totally sting. And the overt horniness of the teens…

  • Moonage Daydream

    Moonage Daydream

    ★★★★★

    David Bowie has always been an important part of my life. While all the other kids I knew in high school were listening to nu-metal or emo stuff, I was discovering the layers behind the enigma I knew only in childhood as the Goblin King. Seeing someone effortlessly redefine the ideas of gender, sexuality, and entertainment as a whole helped a small-town oddball like myself realize what options the world truly offered as long as you went for it with…

  • Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze

    Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze

    ★★★½

    I haven’t seen this in a good 30 years but it’s a fine reminder of a time when a movie could be a toy commercial and still be fun and well-done and have incredible practical effects. Even that Vanilla Ice bit is a blast.

  • Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat

    Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat

    ★★★½

    lmao what the fuck, how is any of this real

  • Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

    Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

    ★★★½

    A little too visually dark and maybe a bit unfocused, but fun and cool and those turtles seem 100% real. I miss the old, pre-Warner New Line Cinema so much.

  • Hot Shots! Part Deux

    Hot Shots! Part Deux

    ★★★★½

    I feel like there are a myriad of reasons a movie like this could never be made now, but god damn it’s still funny. Richard Crenna is a saint for taking this role and Miguel Ferrer will always be one pf the best to ever do it.

  • Clerks III

    Clerks III

    ★★★★½

    My favorite movie in the whole world is Bob Fosse’s All That Jazz, wherein the world’s greatest choreographer and a damn fine director reflects on his life as a lovable, philanderous scoundrel through a thinly veiled fictional character upon realizing his time in this world is limited.

    Kevin Smith’s background is cheaply made dick joke movies and his current place in life seems similarly reflective, but rather than facing mortality via an incredible musical number, he faces it via a…

  • Hot Shots!

    Hot Shots!

    ★★★★½

    I’d seen this a million times as a kid. I only saw Top Gun for the first time in 2007. I already had all the cultural touchstones and on any given day I’d probably still prefer Hot Shots! They truly don’t make ‘em like this anymore.

  • Rambo: First Blood Part II

    Rambo: First Blood Part II

    ★★★★★

    God damn this flick never gets old for me.

  • Monty Python and the Holy Grail

    Monty Python and the Holy Grail

    ★★★★★

    Seeing this with a crowd is an incredible treat.

    I recently learned that the Arthur of legend is purported to reclaim his throne one day. Now would be a really good time for someone to challenge the throne tbh. Imagine Charles on the throne and them *crash* OH MY GOD IT’S STONE COLD’S THEME MUSIC BUT BAH GAWD I THINK IT MAY BE THE ONCE AND FUTURE KING, ARTHUR PENDRAGON! AND EXCALIBUR IS WITH HIM! THIS IS TRULY A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE, FOLKS!

  • Three Thousand Years of Longing

    Three Thousand Years of Longing

    ★★★★½

    A visual feast that seems tailor-made to appeal to me on every level. Some of the more beautiful romantic sentiments I’ve heard expressed in quite a while. I loved this movie, but I’m a hopelessly romantic little shit.

  • Shocker

    Shocker

    ★★★½

    This is way more stupid than I remembered, but still a hell of a lot of fun. I just wish the supernatural stuff had literally any kind of rules. Also ghost girlfriend is ridiculous.