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  • The Fast and the Furious

    The Fast and the Furious

    ★★★½

    Ja Rule enters a street race because if he wins he’ll get to have a threesome and then when somebody passes him he screams “Nooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!”

  • We're Back! A Dinosaur's Story

    We're Back! A Dinosaur's Story

    ★★

    Two things from this movie that have stuck with me for my entire life:

    •the way it depicts NYC was really evocative and romantic to me at five years old. Of all the media it appeared in that I was exposed to, for some reason this is the version that found purchase in my imagination. You get the genre of life you earn and I’m living an unimaginably dumb one.
    •a flock of crows landing on you and covering every…

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  • Fyre Fraud

    Fyre Fraud

    ★★★★★

    It's not actually that good but I'm giving it five stars because I want twenty seven more documentaries about Fyre Fest. Be the change.

  • Bohemian Rhapsody

    Bohemian Rhapsody

    ½

    Gotta hand it to them, they wrote some amazing songs for this!

    Hahaha just a little joke from me, your old friend Branson Reese. This movie is homophobic trash and Bryan Singer should be in prison.