Godzilla vs. Kong

Godzilla vs. Kong

This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

This review may contain spoilers.

God I fucking KNEW IT the MINUTE none of you chucklefucks riffed this movie into the ground I just KNEW they were going to put aside their differences and work together. I’ve grown so used to living in hell with one million clinically depressed tiny court jesters carving every last ounce of meat off the bones of everything that the absence of “more like demigodzilla” jokes basically worked as a spoiler.

I think it’s fine that they do basically fifty 9/11s to Hong Kong in this. I understand if you don’t agree but it’s been twenty years now and also this movie didn’t actually happen. I dunno. I think it’s fine to enjoy this. You can trust that I would be unhappy if this happened in real life.

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