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brat has written 5 reviews for films rated ½ .

  • Sinbad: Legend of the Seven Seas

    Sinbad: Legend of the Seven Seas

    ½

    violently hated it when 7-year-old me was forced to watch it with her family at thanksgiving 2003 & violently hated it when 21-year-old me forced herself to rewatch it last night just for mr. william bradley pitt

  • Cruel Intentions

    Cruel Intentions

    ½

    this is the darkest Clueless (1995) timeline

  • 5 Films About Technology

    5 Films About Technology

    ½

    this was so excruciatingly amateur that i was convinced that it was made by a high schooler so i looked the director up to see if he, like, won a contest or something but NO he's a 31 year old man so there's truly no excuse for its superficiality

    HOWEVER i will say that i do love the idea of shorts playing before feature films (this played before colossal) -- very cool way to showcase burgeoning artists :)

  • The Last Five Years

    The Last Five Years

    ½

    this is the literal worst movie I've ever seen. you know how there are movies that you know are SO bad but they're still your guilty pleasure? that movie about kids eating fried worms (how to eat fried worms) was a cinematically better film and I'm not exaggerating. I'm not being dramatic. why did Anna Kendrick have such bad hair/wardrobe and who was the other guy

  • The Brothers Grimm

    The Brothers Grimm

    ½

    a cat gets killed by falling into a rly huge turbine blender thing.. :///