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  • Sorcerer

    Sorcerer

    ★★★★★

    Like a lot of similar films that were made around this time I can understand why someone wouldn’t enjoy this. The first hour or so unfolds in a way that feels aimless until everything comes together and the action finally happens; the film alternates between a grimy realism that moves and stutters like a documentary and surreal dreamlike moments that feel almost religious in tone. It’s a lot to take in.
    Each of the four men that make up the…

  • Thunderpants

    Thunderpants

    A kid farts himself into outer space and if you don’t get why that’s great then you’re probably into French art house cinema.

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  • The Thaw

    The Thaw

    Cabin Fever meets The Thing made by people with no talent that stars the bloated corpse of Val Kilmer. More than Covid this movie is the threat you should be isolating yourself from. 

    Watched on Lionsgate DVD

  • Conan the Barbarian

    Conan the Barbarian

    ★★★½

    My only complaint is that it periodically drags because there’s a lot of superfluous stuff in it, but otherwise it’s really fun. It has just enough decapitations, just enough needless sexiness, and James Earl Jones killing it as a bad guy who turns into a snake. 

    Watched on Universal DVD

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  • Watchmen

    Watchmen

    ★★★★

    *This review is in regards to the Director’s Cut*

    This is a movie that frustrates the shit out of me but ultimately I can say I genuinely like it. I’m hot and cold with Zach Snyder but I do appreciate his willingness to push himself farther then he might be capable of actually going, and this is a prime example of that for better and worse. I’d rather see a beautiful mess that tries than something ineffectual.
    One of my…

  • Godzilla vs. Kong

    Godzilla vs. Kong

    ★★★★½

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    One word: Mechagodzilla. 

    I’m glad that my first movie theater going experience since Covid lockdowns began was with this because it was a total blast. If you can’t enjoy this I don’t know what to tell you other than “stop being such a turd”. 

    Watched at Cinemark