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  • The Undertaker

    The Undertaker

    ★★★

    don't understand the finale at all but thankful for this beautiful restoration that makes the amazingly hideous 80s clothes really pop, and joe spinell is so good that i actually felt sad for him more than anybody else (yikes emoji)

  • End of Days

    End of Days

    ★★★

    arnold makes a smoothie out of coffee, pepto bismol, beer, leftover chinese food, and pizza he finds on the floor

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  • Minions

    Minions

    when i say i would die for my daughter, it doesn't only mean i would give her a vital organ or make her drink the last of the water in a desert or take her place in front of an oncoming speeding vehicle or pull her out of a burning building. it also means i will die thousands upon thousands of small deaths - i watched the seconds of my life tick slowly away as i endured the mind-numbing boredom…

  • La La Land

    La La Land

    ★★★

    i don't care what anyone - including the director - says, this movie is only about one thing: the soft spot you'll always have for the first obnoxious dumbass you fell in love with