Favorite films

  • Tetsuo: The Iron Man
  • The Handmaiden
  • Branded to Kill
  • The Great Satan

Recent activity

  • Hatchet


  • Annabelle Comes Home


  • In the Trap


  • Mirror Mirror


Recent reviews

  • Hatchet


    being as faceblind as i am deprives me of at least half of the fun this movie has to offer because the cameos are all completely lost on me, which means i have only the gore and the writing to enjoy.

    the writing is trash.

    the gore is gross.

    given the swagger of the film's taglines, Hatchet feels like a pretty cringey disappointment to me.

  • Annabelle Comes Home

    Annabelle Comes Home

    yeah, i think this is one of the bland Conjuring-verse movies.

    i don't have much to say about it, i guess.

Popular reviews

  • Body of Evidence

    Body of Evidence


    i literally don’t know why people don’t like this movie. Madonna and Willem Dafoe are both smokin hot and he’s the bottom. 


    what’s bad?

  • I Am Dragon

    I Am Dragon


    i was worried about this one, but Miroslava immediately proves herself resourceful and driven. and then she’s just that for the rest of the film. there’s only so bad a fairy tail adaptation can be when it has the good sense to make its heroine clever and brave.

    Miroslava turns out to be a 32-year-old Russian woman in a teen body and she is my hero.

    furthermore, her asocial dragon boy is nigh constantly seminude and is extremely nice to…