• Cinderella

    Cinderella

    The premise of the film sounds like a bad SNL skit and the execution feels about the same. The film tries so hard to be modern that one wonders why it wasn't just set in the present day. Every new song made me roll my eyes so hard I started seeing spots. While the stepsisters and Idina Menzel's vocals are a highlight, the movie just seems like the wrong fit.

  • Emma.

    Emma.

    ★★★★★

    In an age where Hollywood wants to make Jane Austen's works gritty, this adaptation of Emma stays true to the technicolor pastels of the regency period. The film somehow manages to both have high stakes and also take place in Austen's cozy version of pastoral Britain, where witty women trade flirtatious barbs with brash men who hide secret affections. Emma stands as an achievement in how to do Jane Austen right.

  • Malignant

    Malignant

    This movie is a throwback to those early 2010s movies where someone hears a noise, goes "Hello?" and then slowly walks into the dark hallway. The script for this movie is not only predictable, but it's every plot point goes out of its way to be the most insulting version of overdone horror movie cliches. This movie was marketed as James Wan's "Return to Horror," but it only reinforces the old saying, "You can never go home again.

  • The Suicide Squad

    The Suicide Squad

    ★★★★★

    Look I had fun okay

  • The Green Knight

    The Green Knight

    ★★★★★

    There's not a single sword fight in this movie, and thank god for that. Instead, the film tells a simple story dripping in verisimilitude. The first scene with the Green Knight is the signature scene, from the possession of Gwenevere to the sound design of the titular knight to the moment when Arthur hands Excalibur to Gawain.

    Dev Patel is fantastic as Gawain, a much more flawed counterpart to the legendary Gawain. Even though there are huge portions of the…

  • The Tomorrow War

    The Tomorrow War

    I wish I could go back in time and watch this movie while drunk so I could've enjoyed it more

  • It

    It

    ★★★

    Hi my name is Pennywise, my motivation is eating children which is why I just randomly attack them then let them get away so I can fulfill the producers' quota of scary movie trailer scenes

  • Loki

    Loki

    ★★★★

    Oh man this TV show was so great until the last episode reminded me that this isn't a TV show, it's corporate synergy for the newest Marvel movie

    But Loki is funny and stuff

  • Spiral

    Spiral

    ★★

    Our town *rubber ducky sound* is cursed *crazy snap-zoom shot* by the spiral *studio audience laughter*

  • Crimson Peak

    Crimson Peak

    ★★★★★

    It's a masterpiece mix of Wuthering Heights and Scooby-Doo on Zombie Island

  • Luca

    Luca

    ★★★★★

    Just like an old friend of mine Will Smith said, "Sea monster parents just don't understand

  • Bo Burnham: Inside

    Bo Burnham: Inside

    ★★★★★

    It's like Pink Floyd's The Wall, but with more funny bits