Favorite films

  • Five Element Ninjas
  • Rear Window
  • The Thing
  • Spirited Away

Recent activity

  • Deadpool


  • Venom


  • Air

  • Akiba Maid War


Pinned reviews

  • Black Samurai

    Black Samurai


    I’m pretty sure Jim Kelly tried to punch a bird in the dick in this movie. Birds mostly don’t have dicks, but he damn well tried his best.

    [Alamo Season Pass]

  • Claire's Knee

    Claire's Knee


    I have deeply mixed feelings about Claire’s Knee, one of Eric Rohmer’s Six Moral Tales. I think the film (and director) knows what an utter fucking bastard the lead, Jerome, is. I know the film thinks he’s a buffoon – the directorial stand-in, Aurora, writer and friend of Jerome, is constantly watching him with a smirk, pushing him toward folly and observing his failures, moral and otherwise. But does the film cut him too much slack? And does Rohmer’s unnatural…

Recent reviews

  • Deadpool



    Still think the bits goofing on the pomposity of the X-Men are funny, but otherwise I generally liked this less than the first time I saw it. The structure is such an absolute mess of unnecessary recursive flashbacks designed to zazz up a really basic and tedious narrative. Should have been shorter and more focused on silly violence, which is where the film shines.

  • Venom



    Rewatch at the boy’s request. These movies should be unwatchable, the CGI is SyFy channel level, the plotting is juvenile, the premise is as wannabe edgelord as in the original comics, but Tom Hardy is such a big fucking weirdo, he makes these fun. At least when he’s arguing with himself as Venom, the rest, you know, check your phone, use the bathroom … I barely paid attention during the opening 8000 hours before Hardy gets the symbiote or during the big final battle.

Popular reviews

  • The Perfection

    The Perfection


    I am genuinely uncertain whether what I just watched was terrible terrible, or hilariously awesomely terrible. And I'm not sure if the director and cast know either. But I wasn't bored.

    I attended a screening with a Q&A from director Richard Shepard and stars Alison Williams and Logan Browning, and Shepard said the film was shot in 24 days, cheap and fast, from an idea he developed himself for Williams, and that seems about right. Shepard also said his inspiration…

  • Vampire Hunter D: Bloodlust

    Vampire Hunter D: Bloodlust



    So, I was familiar with the 1985 Vampire Hunter D and very familiar with director Yoshiaki Kawajiri, but I’d never watched the Kawajiri-directed sequel (technically based on the third book in the series) Bloodlust. And holy shit, it was great! Kawajiri with the sexual assault dialed all the way down and the gothic imagery and weirdness dialed up, bringing us heavy Ninja Scroll vibes but darkly romantic instead of sleazy, and more steampunk than his usual cyberpunk. 

    It’s also…