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  • The Texas Chain Saw Massacre

    The Texas Chain Saw Massacre

    ★★★★

    Bravura, Powerhouse, Game-Changing, Historic. These are words often chucked about in a cavalier fashion like Chief Brody slinging chum off the Orca. Tobe Hooper’s Texas Chain Saw Massacre is all of these things and more. It invented and reinvented a genre that, with the exception of Night of the Living Dead, had grafted itself to a basic formula in the US.

    The story of TCM is basic: People in the wrong place at the wrong time. What separates it is…

  • Halloween III: Season of the Witch

    Halloween III: Season of the Witch

    ★★★

    Hoop-tober 3.0
    Other reviews: #2

    It’s not breaking news that Halloween 3 was a failure by any metric when it was released. It dropped it’s antagonist, utilized a horror genre that was all but dead at that point in time, and was a bit clunky and unlike any of the popular horror of that period. It’s also not a secret that it has become an often championed ‘misunderstood’ film by a growing number of enthusiastic fans. Like most things, the…

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  • Night of the Living Dead

    Night of the Living Dead

    ★★★★½

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    Dear 1968:

    We made a film that has the following:

    -Female protagonist.
    -Whoops! Now an African-American protagonist.
    -It is in black & white.
    -It's all in one night! All in one one house!
    -We wait forever to even kind of tell you what's going on
    -People eat other people! You even get to see it!
    -Women die!
    -Kids die!
    -Kids kill their folks!
    -Brothers kill sisters!
    -Wait, everyone dies!
    -Whatever was happening has no conclusion!

    Please enjoy our film,

    George A.…

  • WALL·E

    WALL·E

    ★★★★½

    I don't feel like going on about something right now, but I WILL say this:

    WALL*E is the best love story I can think of, going back to at least When Harry Met Sally, and one of the sweetest and most effective I've ever seen. How far you have fallen so quickly Pixar. After Up, it has been nothing but down. (ba-dum-bum)