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  • Mary Poppins Returns

    Mary Poppins Returns

    ★★★½

    Emily Blunt is incredible. The film has its lulls, but it's an energetic, addictive experience. I love the music, the kids, the respect shown to the original, and the devotion to improvement. Not everything feels like a step up, but it's not a uniform step down, either. I'll be listening to this soundtrack for quite a while.

  • Ralph Breaks the Internet

    Ralph Breaks the Internet

    ★★★½

    Wreck-It Ralph was the Ready Player One film we all deserved. Ralph Breaks the Internet is the Emoji Movie film we all deserved. Featuring the continued brilliant voice acting from Silverman and Reilly, an expanded world featuring the Disney Princesses that set my heart a-quiver, and a heartfelt message about friendship and insecurity, this is a very good movie.

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  • Hercules in New York

    Hercules in New York

    ½

    I mean, it's just gloriously awful.

    A hot dog vendor chases after a guy who bought a hot dog whose chariot is stolen by Arnie. The vendor chases them for miles through the city, telling the man that he shouldn't forget his sauerkraut. Finally, he catches up with the guy and he dances around him trying to put the sauerkraut on the hot dog. When he actually does, the camera zooms in on the hot dog and makes a big deal about this completely unnecessary and pointless action that can't possibly be worth a single second of screen time.

    Woo, boy.

  • Brexit: The Uncivil War

    Brexit: The Uncivil War

    ★½

    Welp. I guess it's about on par with the Fifth Estate. No strenuous accent, at least.

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  • A Dog's Purpose

    A Dog's Purpose

    ½

    The controversy doesn't matter in rating the film. I personally feel as though the video and TMZ blew things out of proportion. Whatever problems were happening seem to have been minimal and with no malicious intent.

    As for the film itself, it is one of the most manipulative things I've ever seen. Josh Gad isn't even 1% of the voice actor here as he was in Frozen. The implications of reincarnation and dogs in general is utterly absurd. It feels…

  • Fur: An Imaginary Portrait of Diane Arbus

    Fur: An Imaginary Portrait of Diane Arbus

    ★½

    March 2016 Scavenger Hunt

    Film #1/Task #1
    An unconventional romantic film.


    I decided to focus my reviews on the task, as opposed to the film as a whole.

    Downey and Kidman are just so strange. Their characters languish over almost everything. Their touch lingers whenever they pick up the simplest mundane object. It's very off-putting, but it does help to elevate them above the rest of the characters to the point where you can really see a connection forming between…