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  • Charlie's Angels

    Charlie's Angels

    ★★★★

    EARLY 2000s JAMS & CHEESY EXPLOSION SFX. APPROXIMATELY 50 DISGUISES. TOTALLY SPIES-STYLE NOKIA GADGETS. LUCY LIU'S HAIR FLIP. CAMERON DIAZ'S WHITE GIRL DANCING. DREW BARRYMORE DEFYING GRAVITY AND TAKING OUT 10 MEN IN HIGH OCTANE CONTINUOUS TAKES. SAM ROCKWELL'S SEXY RED SHADES. THE FACT THAT MATT LEBLANC IS THIS UNIVERSE'S LEADING ACTION STAR. they just don't make JOYFUL MASTERPIECES like this anymore!!!!!

  • In a Heartbeat

    In a Heartbeat

    WHOLESOME™

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  • Moonlight

    Moonlight

    ★★★★★

    I watched this again as part of a queer film festival. Before the screening, the organizer was so happy he could barely speak, he just blubbered for a while before yelling: "A BEAUTIFUL QUEER FILM ABOUT BLACK PEOPLE WON BEST PICTURE!!!!" and 800 people cheered. Anyway, that was pretty much the best feeling in the world.

  • Call Me by Your Name

    Call Me by Your Name

    ★★★★★

    DO YOU EVER WATCH A MOVIE SO BEAUTIFUL & SENSUAL THAT YOU LEAVE THE CINEMA RED-FACED & DESPONDENT BECAUSE U CAN'T WATCH IT AGAIN IMMEDIATELY??? More accurately, do you ever watch a movie that makes you want to impulsively buy a plane ticket to Northern Italy, sink into a bathtub with a glass of pinot noir and weep gentle tears until Armie Hammer comes along - complete in billowy blue shirt and booty shorts - to wipe them away, and promise that…