Zack Snyder's Justice League

Zack Snyder's Justice League ★★★½

Bigger, longer, and un(SNYDER)cut. Here we go.

+ Steppenwolf is looking kinda dummy thicc in this one. I appreciate it.
+ CYBORG. The absolute heart of this film. F off, Joss Whedon and other studio head haters.
+ An absolute smidge of Green Lantern.
+ Silas Stone!!!!! Creator of Skynet, father of Cyborg.

- Diana Prince dusting off/preserving(?) a museum statue in a white dress and heels. LOL. Does she even archaeology, broh?
- Why is Aquaman wearing pants?
- Why is Superman wearing pants?
- All the WINK WINK corny ass moments.
- Mera's British accent????
- All the unnecessary slo mo.
- The music is honestly terrible.
- The weird singing woman + Aquaman sweater sniff??
- Aquaman's colored contacts are too weird.
- Jared Leto's Joker is an L all around.

Look. I thought about giving this 4 stars - one star for every hour - but then I took a step back and marinated. I hesitated. I tossed and turned. It's true that this is insanely long. I can think of at least 30 minutes that could have been cut without any harm to the main story arc to preserve some brain cells for other things. But alas.

The Joss Whedon cut sucks. This original story is far superior in a lot of ways, but it isn't without its flaws. There's a lot about this movie that is fun and didn't feel like 4 hours. But there was a lot that was really just unthinkably terrible - the dialog, the music, some of the acting.... But in the end, I was entertained. It was FINE. I want to see the rest of the Snyderverse, and that's I guess something.

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