Malignant ★★★

This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

This review may contain spoilers.

I have so many thoughts!

-A few scenes are blitzkrieged by uber-corny, overbearing scores:

A psychotic symphonic approximation of “Where is My Mind?” plays as cops check out corpses #71-73.

At one point, it sounds like the murderer is sharpening his murder tools in a Flashdance montage. 

Emily’s sister drives through Northern California wine country-looking roads, and as a castle appears in the distance…dubstep stomps on the scene like Godzilla with indigestion.

-The film takes place in Seattle, and the killer starts off looking like Pearl Jam’s Mike McCready (if his head was also facing the wrong way). However, he then starts looking like Glenn Danzig if he stopped working out for a couple months, and I don’t think Danzig lived in Seattle.

-The film goes full camp when we see all the bad to the bone cliche women in Emily’s jail cell. “What’d you do to get in here? Forget to separate the recycling?” is an amazing line.

-I love when the mom yells, “Lying cock-knockers!” for absolutely no reason. I think that line was included because James Wan lost a bet he made while drunk at 3 am one night.

-Gabriel coming out of Emily’s back ruuuuuuules. I love his franticly clawing arms paired with his  Edvard Munch’s Scream mouth. It should be a dance move!

-Yes, the climactic scene is a total Possession rip off, but the cartoonish graphic violence is glorious. It’s one of the campier fight scenes I’ve seen in a while. Neck snap rim shot!

-My biggest complaint is a common one, but thankfully almost all of this was confined to the first half. I hate when a film establishes that it’s gonna lean on jump scares, and then has scene after scene composed entirely of waiting for the jump scare, and the jump scare itself. The height of creativity within these scenes is varying the timing of the jump scare. Congratulations on being slightly less predictable in the delivery of a completely predictable scene!

I didn’t enjoy the first half of Malignant, but when it found its footing and went balls out bonkers, it turned into a fun film!

2021 Ranked

DallasFrance liked these reviews