— The T-Rex, Jurassic Park
One of those rare cinematic curiosities where you can tell instantly how old someone was when they first saw the film based upon their reaction to it today.
It goes like this: almost without exception, those who first saw Hook as an adult will—by virtue of being a horrible grown-up—completely and utterly loathe the film, detesting everything it represents about cinema today. They will deride Hook as bloated and indulgent; treacly Spielbergian sentimentality run amuck; and, worst of all—*gasp*—totally made-up,…
The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent 2022
Spoiler alert: Paddington 2 is just simply a fantastic movie.
Sonic the Hedgehog 2020
An instant classic. This movie had me at “I hate mushrooms…”
Man of Steel 2013
Ah, the summer movie season... *BUILDING SMASH*
There's noth-*COLLAPSING TOWER*-ing quite *SMASH* like the *CAR HURLING TOWARD US* good old *ENTIRE SKYSCRAPER FLOOR WIPED OUT* Hollywood *BAD GUYS DECIMATES 7-ELEVEN* summer *MASSIVE GAS-FUELED FIRE ERUPTION* blockbuster *EXPLOSION* treatment *EVEN BIGGER EXPLOSION* to make you apprec-*FALLING BUILDING WAY TOO CLOSE TO OUR HERO'S GIRLFRIEND FOR COMFORT*-iate a fant-*FIREBALL*-astic *CAR SMASH* story *EXPLOSION* like *MINI-EXPLOSION* Super-*HERO SAVES INNOCENT BYSTANDER JUST IN TIME*-man. It's great, *HERO THROWN THROUGH THREE BUILDINGS* isn't it?
Star Wars: The Force Awakens 2015
When I grow up, I wanna be Chewbacca.
That is all I have to say for now, ladies and gentlemen.