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  • Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle

    Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle

    ★★★

    "In life you only have one life"

    Eh, not as bad as I expected another remake/reboot to be, it's actually pretty great at both reimagining the original film and the picture book without completely fucking it up, but it still fucks up in some places.

    Alike most mainstream films, Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle has a force fed message of "you only live once", which is conveyed to the audience three times during the film through character dialogue. The first…

  • Yoga Hosers

    Yoga Hosers

    ★★

    "Haters have got to hate, like the douches have to douche. That's the life, right there in a nutshell."

    What the fuck happened to Kevin Smith and his films?

    Yoga Hosers is a combination of outdated Baby Boomer/Generation X thought process of Millennial and their use of technology, both obvious (and cringeworthy) and subtle references to Clerks, and a home video for the Depp and Smith family.

    I think the worst Clerks reference, if it even is a reference because…

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  • The Disaster Artist

    The Disaster Artist

    ★★★★

    1994: Johnny Depp as Ed Wood

    2017: James Franco as Tommy Wiseau

    2040: Adam Driver as Neil Breen

  • The Warriors

    The Warriors

    ★★★★★

    "Can you dig it?"

    Yes, I dig it, but try explaining this film to somebody and it sounds dumb:

    "So yeah there's this gang of men that wear vests that were framed into a high gang leader's assassination and now all the gang's are after them as they try to catch the train home. There's a gang that wears black singlets, a gang that wears black singlets with red stripes, a gang of mimes, a gang of basketball nuts, a…