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  • Lady Bird

    Lady Bird

    ★★★★★

    I'm not a viewer of the Oscars or even a fan, but Lady Bird was fuckin' robbed! I related to so much of it that I couldn't help but fall in love with it instantly. I went to high school at the same time as Lady Bird, the early 2000's, and the movie touches on so much that I experienced in high school.

    Granted I am a dumb ass white guy and not a young woman going to a Catholic…

  • The Shape of Water

    The Shape of Water

    ★★★

    Minus 1 star for not showing that fish man's junk.

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  • The Cloverfield Paradox

    The Cloverfield Paradox

    Maybe all of those think pieces about how Netflix really isn't a film industry disruptor but more of a dumping ground for big budget studio rejects are on to something...

    This movie wishes it was Sunshine or Interstellar, but it comes off more like a low grade pg-13 Event Horizon knock-off. Also, fuck off with that "we gotta make all of these movies connected so jam in some bullshit about wormholes that shoot out time travelling inter-dimensional godzillas or whatever" shite.

  • It

    It

    ★★★

    Oh no, this is gonna be a long review isn't it? I mean, a long review for me. I don't think I can get away with writing a few sentences and rely on my garbage sardonic wit to carry me across the finish line. No, I actually have thoughts about 'It'.

    First off, the biggest issue with 'It', or the biggest one that isn't super problematic, is that it completely falls for all the same tropes as every other modern…