The Main Event ★½


...regret watching WWE product placement thinly disguised as a run-of-the-mill kids movie? Ladies and gentlemen, we have a real contender if that's what you wanna see!

Right out the gate comes the self-promotin' and self-congratulatin', actin' as if he alone raised up an entire new generation of wrestlers. The kid being a huge fan, bonding with his buddies, and dealing with bullies ain't enough. He also finds a magical MacGuffin that enables him to enter the ring. Sounds awesome, right?! Oh, what's that? Shazam and Like Mike would like a word with him? Get a load of these chumps!

The kid will impress you with his moves such as: THE ONE-TWO CLICHÉ SMACKEROONI, THE FLATTENING JOKE, THE PLOT CONTRIVANCE, THE CARDBOARD CHARACTER BUILDER, AND THE UNNECESSARY PADDIN'WHACK. Any of you big brain screenwriters out there should be quivering in your pants right about now!

He's a tough guy. But he also got a soft spot on the inside. He knows how to have fun! He ain't too boring! He's got likable friends and family tryin' to put on a good show. You get to see a couple of 'em dance and they do great. And there's a little something about building confidence... which he easily has more of than the competition! Don't mistake his good side for weakness or he'll pummel ya, you hear!

You can watch Smackdown and Raw to get more entertaining ring action. But you'd be missing out on The Main Event... which there ain't much to miss. As you should because he's everywhere!

Hold up! A new challenger appears? They say he's got a better story? The kids and parents love him? And his big beating heart is the strongest you ever seen out of a wrestler?! Swooping in all the way from North Carolina, here comes... THE PEANUT BUTTER FALCON! Oh boy, a match between two underdogs? We're gonna have to see this!

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