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  • Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory

    Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory

    ★★★

    Charlie spends the last of his money on a Wonka Bar for Grandpa Joe – then as soon as he finds out there’s still a golden ticket out there, he opens it for himself AND has the audacity to say “oh I do wish you could come with me Grandpa Joe”. 

    LITTLE SHIT.

  • Mulan

    Mulan

    ★★★

    A weird case of a musical that really doesn’t want to be a musical. The songs reluctantly get shoved in, not pushing the story forward in any particularly meaningful way (compared to, say, the storytelling masterclass of Frozen’s Do You Want To Build A Snowman?) and just put the brakes on any momentum. Will be interesting to see if the forthcoming live action version bothers to keep them in.

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  • Mission: Impossible - Fallout

    Mission: Impossible - Fallout

    ★★★★½

    Me: 
    hmm, really not sure if breaking the tradition of a different director for each Mission: Impossible film is a great idea

    Me, 147 minutes later: 
    CHRISTOPHER MCQUARRIE TO DIRECT ALL FUTURE TOM CRUISE FILMS PLEASE AND THANK YOU

    An epic – and potentially untoppable – greatest hits of all the best action movies of the past ten or so years. A mostly successful blend of Dark Knight, Inception, Bourne and the Neeson/Reeves one-old-man-army films, plus unexpected bits of Little Whie Lies and The Return of the King thrown in for good measure.

  • Captain America: Civil War

    Captain America: Civil War

    ★★½

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    Some thoughts:
    — What an inconsequential mess. A dense quiche of a film. 
    — It could all be resolved if the characters just had a conversation, or maybe didn't make huge decisions based on a poorly printed fax.
    — You know those overstuffed and beige ensemble films like New Year's Eve and Valentines Day? It's basically one of those. 
    — Remember how much fun the first Captain America film was? Yeah, we're a long way from there now. Dour is…