King Arthur: Legend of the Sword ★★½

Three minutes into this film, as giant elephants with wrecking balls are demolishing some crazy bridge castle thing, I had a big smile on my face, as "amiable batshit" is by far my favorite mode of not-very-good movie. Alas, full-bore insanity rapidly gives way to something more boring, slam-packed with montages and non-linear cutting that slows things down by speeding them up, jumping past the details that might actually make this interesting. Put it this way: I'm down with a film that puts a character called Kung-Fu George in medieval England, although I perfectly understand why reasonable people would disagree. I'm not down with a film that doesn't give Kung-Fu George the chance to do kung-fu for more than 2.5 seconds in one shaky shot.