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  • First Man

    First Man

    ★★★★

    slips a crumpled up $5 bill to Josh Singer
    Psst, you're allowed to make a character interesting, even if they weren't interesting in real life! It's a movie! Do whatever you want, Josh Singer! You still did a good job, Josh Singer! I'm proud of you!

  • Searching

    Searching

    ★★★★

    By 2020, there will be an episode of Law and Order: SVU entirely shot this way. Ice-T and Richard Belzer will spend three minutes confusedly trying to Gchat with with Mariska Hargitay. NBC will advertise it as a "groundbreaking television event". It will be exactly 1/12th as good as this movie.

    This movie was very good.

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  • American Hustle

    American Hustle

    ★★½

    Are we sure this movie exists? If I watched it and I couldn't tell you one thing about it, did I really watch it? Did you watch it? Did any of us actually watch American Hustle?? I choose to think not.

    Thank you for your time.

  • Christopher Robin

    Christopher Robin

    ★★½

    More than anything this movie made me happy that Bill Watterson is a reclusive purist, so we’ll never have to see a Calvin and Hobbes movie as bad as this.