• Bodies Bodies Bodies

    Bodies Bodies Bodies

    ★★★★½

    FUCK REVIEWS
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  • Emily the Criminal

    Emily the Criminal

    ★★★½

    a punk movie that i wish felt more punk. i hope John Patton Ford's next movie takes more visual risks, because he clearly has the talent. this movie can be so tense and engaging when it wants to be. and it's so good at isolating the core anxiety of the debt crisis. good movie! hopefully i'm not underselling it.

  • Inu-oh

    Inu-oh

    ★½

    how is this film this boring. to be blunt, i don't think Yuasa is a very good filmmaker. i hear good things about his series' though. maybe he just makes films when he doesn't believe in them enough to make them a series, idk that's what it feels like.

    even after not liking any of his past 4 films, i was still really excited about this. Yuasa does 2 things super well: montages & music (except for Night is Short). this…

  • Night Is Short, Walk on Girl

    Night Is Short, Walk on Girl

    ★½

    i give up. outside of the visuals, i do not understand the appeal of this, or Yuasa's filmography, at all. aggressively unfunny in the most unpleasant ways, characters that range from absolutely nothing to annoying, the same perv shit he always does but trying to be self-aware about it without any honest examination. it's too plot and dialogue heavy to even be dreamlike. it's a was of lovely, annoying nothing. there's no reason to be that mean, but i'm just…

  • Lu Over the Wall

    Lu Over the Wall

    ★★½

    i hope his miniseries are better, because of the 3 films i've seen from him (haven't seen Night is Short yet) there hasn't been a single character, no matter the size of the role, that was well written imho. he's super good at montages. those are where his skills are allowed to shine. but in regard to theming, dialogue, just general traditional "substance" (i know that's mean) he does nothing for me. maybe because it's his most Ghibli, but this…

  • Mind Game

    Mind Game

    ★★

    i'm so sad i don't like this. this movie wears its male gaze on its sleeve so shamelessly, and it's deeply uncomfortable to watch sometimes. (though weirdly the sex scene was fantastic, wtf is up with that?) and this is super mean, but ngl this gave me sliiiiiiight incel vibes.

    the psychedelia in this is something that seems honestly visually innovative at times. and there are moments, especially when the film places emphasis on music, where i'm really into it!…

  • 1941

    1941

    holy shit this is bad. i knew it was regarded as Spielberg's worst, but no one prepared me for this shit. Spielberg, even in his great films, has never been "funny." he's been charming, fun, and sometimes a bit goofy, but never straight-up funny. so of course him making an Animal House WAR comedy was a crazy bad idea. (how was Zemeckis a co-writer on this, though?)

    this brand of 70's comedy was never funny, though. They're all the same,…

  • The Adventures of Tintin

    The Adventures of Tintin

    ★★½

    this was weirdly underwhelming for me. i was hype for this. and when it started, i was even more excited. i absolutely love when characters are reading old maps and journals in an attic/dark library. and the knowledge that Spielberg loves Castle of Cagliostro made me even more optimistic, because i also love that movie!

    but a lot of things just didn't work for me. the animation i'm like whatever on, but the camera is another. it moves bizarrely unnaturally…

  • War Horse

    War Horse

    ★★

    Dab, War Horse!

  • The Color Purple

    The Color Purple

    ★★★½

    this movie is more interesting for the discussion that could be had about it's existence, rather than any theme the movie tries to get across. for what the movie is, i think it's a little great. but "what it is" is up in the air, and that's not my discussion to way in on.

  • Close Encounters of the Third Kind

    Close Encounters of the Third Kind

    ★★★★

    this movie has some of the most absurdly flooring imagery i've seen in a film. and it all comes together at the end with some of the best 20 minutes in film history. i really wish that i got more invested in the rest of the film, though. looking back, i like the concept of exploring obsession more than i did watching it (at least a decent portion of the time). really glad i finally saw this dope dope dope movie, but just wish i saw it under better circumstances. (DO NOT SELL YOUR USED BLU-RAY TO A VIDEO STORE IF IT'S REALLY SCRATCHED YOU SCHMUCK)

  • The Lost World: Jurassic Park

    The Lost World: Jurassic Park

    ★½

    this movie amos up all the unpleasantness of Jurassic Park and strips out the light-hearted wonder. i appreciate the theming i guess, but it didn't really leave a mark on me in any way whatsoever. basically i'll come back to this if i want unfun dinosaur porn with more arguing, more mud, more nighttime CGI (my favorite!)