• Nope



    Saw it in IMAX,and I can't wait to see it again! On TV! With closed captioning! Because some unholy combination of the film's sound mix and the theatre's sound system made 50+% of the dialogue unintelligible to my ears.

    But here's the thing ... the movie still worked like gangbusters.

  • The Killer That Stalked New York

    The Killer That Stalked New York


    The film opens with deadpan narration imparting information that will all be revealed by the action, piece by piece, over the first half of the run time. The result? All intrigue and suspense is jettisoned from the film, moments after it's begun. The film wouldn't be a masterpiece if the narration was killed, but the script and direction and efficient enough that it would be interesting to watch unfold. What remains after the narrator shuts up is mostly of camp value, though the plentiful NYC location shooting sustains some interest. The one single rear projected shot feels like a betrayal.

  • Muppets Haunted Mansion

    Muppets Haunted Mansion


    I've never enjoyed any post-Henson Muppet stuff, not just because of the weaker material but also because new voice actors means Kermit is always an impostor. Even so, the new Kermit voice is so awful here that even my kid--who likes almost everything--was unhappy about it.

  • Space Jam: A New Legacy

    Space Jam: A New Legacy

    The most enjoyable thing about this movie was trying to spot all of the references (mostly dialogue) to NON-Warner properties. They couldn't even stick to their stupid pimp-our-IP assignment successfully!

  • The Amorous Indies

    The Amorous Indies

    Would happily have watched another 2 hours of this, to be honest.

  • The Beatles: Get Back

    The Beatles: Get Back

    Saw dozens of scenes get memed and obsessed over on Twitter yet not the one where Paul and John sing "Two of Us" with their teeth seemingly glued shut. One of the most hilarious and unsettling scenes of the last 50 years.

  • The Conjuring

    The Conjuring


    Maybe 1.5/4 is a bit stingy but I'm factoring in the fact that I'd seen it before and not a single scene seemed familiar to me.

    I do like, however, that in spite of the film's attempts to portray them as valiant and legit, it's still completely obvious that the Warrens were snake oil salesmen.

  • The French Dispatch

    The French Dispatch


    I had to make a frenzied washroom dash in the middle of the Chalamet story, which is the one a lot of people seem to dislike.

    So I reserve the right to drop down to 3.5 stars on a more complete second viewing.

    The Seydoux/Del Toro and Wright/Amalric stories are perfection, however.

  • WALL·E



    Still a top 2 Pixar for me. The stuff on Earth remains as perfect as anything they ever did, the space stuff is a small step down, mostly due to the social satire being a bit too broad to follow the elegant bliss of the first half.

    Probably not an original observation, but if the events in this film genuinely came to pass, the starship would absolutely be the Disney Cruise ship of the future, owned and operated by the House of Mouse.

  • Last Night in Soho

    Last Night in Soho


    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    Was a little bored, as I guessed everything well in advance, not because I'm smart but because I thought "no way a charisma vacuum like Matt Smith could grow up to be Terence fucking Stamp".

  • Thunderbolt



    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    Took my ability to guess endings to a new level with my gut feeling from the first that his name was Aloysius.

  • Saw 3D

    Saw 3D


    This film dares to ask the uncomfortable question "what if a worse-than-usual SAW movie had a Canadian episodic television aesthetic?"