Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice

Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice ★★½

Here is a peculiar chain of consequences for all of us to reflect upon:

-Step 1: A superhero masterpiece gets released in the 70s, leaving a mark for all future generations of filmmakers meant to be inspired to further develop the genre.
*Note 1: My sequence of steps should involve any type of film, and not only superhero films, let alone Superman (1978).
-Step 2: For some damn idiotic reason that surpasses all my intellectual capabilities, MODERN audiences affirm that a film is now in a serious need(?!) of a remake because it has been [insert completely arbitrary number here] years since the original film was released. "Who should get cast/Who should direct the new version" question posts reproduce like rabbits in IMDB and YouTube, further creating a demand in social media that producers spot out. A very disturbing demand.
-Step 3: Based on the orgasmic financial potential that these demanded remakes are representing for production companies, supply enters the equation, and classics get remade for the modern generations because, for some otherworldly Buñuelian reason, the remakes were deemed as "necessary". In 95% of the cases this implies cinematic efforts reflected in multimillionaire budget investments in special effects rather than an authentic concern in what is cinematically relevant.
-Step 4: Evil demand complains because a lousy remake just got made by either a director with no experience, a director who was told to shut up and stick to the script written by greedy people, or a famous director with a solid film trajectory behind in his now palpable days of quality decay. In our specific Superman example, the third scenario happens and the ultralame Superman Returns (2006) comes out directly from Scorpion's lair.
-Step 5: Evil demand screams for another shot (WHYYY!!!!!). They decide to take a famous director with "expertise" (lol) in the genre this time. A reboot emerges from Shao Kahn's house this time. It's shit. Evil demand saw it coming, but evil demand will still be paying.
-Step 6: Producers measure their success based on terms not of RT ratings, or IMDB score rankings, but on how much people were fapping to the trailers and on their ROI which, if greater than 100%, means that they should keep going at it. Hence, sequels get made. They are also shit. They traduce money with audiences' love.
-Step 7: Evil demand keeps complaining, but evil demand will still be paying, because it is naive. So many Justice League movies are inevitable in the future.

Conclusion: Evil demand is a drug addict, production companies are the drug dealers, and these movies are drugs. They must be, because witnessing how unevenly the two drastically different halves (the first one, great and courageous; the second one, reiterating why the genre is so rotten today) were assembled must have been done while high.

Random Highlights Section

1) Props for Batman's inception-esque post-apocalyptic dream sequence linking Superman with Darkseid and The Flash's ability to travel through time. That was an exciting way to prepare future terrain... Then again, after witnessing Snyder's bad DC attempts, there is no real reason why I should be excited, now is there?

2) For Eisenberg: thumbs up! That deluded Facebook creator bastard.

3) Batman saying "Oh shit" is the funniest reflection of the screenwriters saying "Screw this!" and dropping the mic on stage.

4) The countless nods to Frank Miller's The Dark Knight Returns are priceless.


P.S. What bothers me to the core is that I MUST list this film along with the few sequels in cinema history to surpass the original. Damn!!

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