Annette ★½

The 10-minute stretch of film where the Annette puppet looked the most like Chucky - after it looked like a babymonster, before it looked like the Wendy’s logo - that was the only stretch of the film where my soul knew peace.

Never explicitly says so out loud, but clearly divides the world into “creatives” and “non-creatives,” and pretends to judge the former as cover for loathing the latter. Grovels at the feet of the gender binary, eagerly raising its Nice Guy Who Worships Women hand while simultaneously endowing Marion Cotillard with the blander and less musically compelling role. Briefly teases, in the almost good opening number, that it will judge cops but never delivers on that tease while judging the rest of modern culture in a pile-Driver-ing downward punch. And does all this with music that isn’t very good!

The Simon Helberg version of We Love Each Other So Much was the one music moment that soared, but it also revealed how much that song is ripping off the music of La La Land. 

And the talking portion of the prison sequence was decent, but I hated how 4K it looked. 

All in all, I was bored to tears, luvs. 🥴

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