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  • Artemis Fowl

    Artemis Fowl

    No one can convince me that Artemis Fowl is an actual movie and not some terrible Ambien & CBD fever dream my addled brain cooked up, after being stuck in quarantine for months.

    Although, to be fair, that dream would have been more coherent.

  • Death Feud

    Death Feud

    ★★½

    Savage Harbor is the kind of bad movie that people try to replicate, before realizing that magic isn't planned, it happens organically.
    There's souch weirdness here, that can't fully be explained. Scenes end abruptly. There's flashbacks to scenes we didn't know actually occured, that are used to explain dream sequences from 45 minutes earlier. The "f" word gets thrown around so liberally, you know this was made in the 80's. The majority of the action involves Stallone punching people in the dick. It's perpetually Christmas, even though 6 months pass, at one point
    Glorious imitation warmed over cheese

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  • The Night Comes for Us

    The Night Comes for Us

    ★★★★½

    Gloriously vrutal and unrelenting. Like a runaway freight train picking up casualties as it careens down a hill. Must be seen with a big group of friends and a few choice drinks.

    Those who have problems will h copious amounts of broken bones and a few gallons of blood, need not apply.

  • The Ritual

    The Ritual

    ★★★½

    Yes it's derivative to a degree, but it also pushes past this notion to at least make a mark. There's a huge huge amount of films that cover the "lost in the woods" category, specially in the last 18 years. The key here is the use of cinematography, score, a compellingly acted lead and one hell of a creature design.

    It doesn't do enough to be the best of it's ilk, but it leave an impression. That alone is better than being lamented or forgotten.