This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

im not sure if it would do anything to improve anyone's chances of survival but regardless i feel like someone really ought to apologize to Ms. Blair Witch. she was tortured to death by shitty colonists and now all she wants to do is live her death peacefully in her fixer upper in the middle of the woods and meddling kids won't leave her alone!! im sorry blair witch. i love and respect you. i won't bother u.

Oh just fuck off, will ya?

But, it's a sequel/reboot! We have to pay homage to the original!

Listen Mr You've-directed-the-guest-so-you-deserve-some-slack-but-you're-awfully-close-to-being-called-mr-Wankard-from-now-on, paying homage does not mean basically copying everything and simply updating it. And how the fuck are you paying homage if you TAKE AWAY EVERY SINGLE BIT OF MYSTERY THAT MADE THE ORIGINAL SO TERRIFYING? (to me, that is. I scare easily.)

But but we've got all these cool cameras and stuff

THAT YOU ONLY USE TO INDUCE EPILEPSY!!

But we've got a drone

FUCK OFF!!

But we're totally expanding the mythology around the Blair Witch

NO YOU'RE NOT YOU DAFT WANKER YOU'RE DESTROYING IT BY ACTUALLY SHOWING EVERYTHING. MY IMAGINATION IS MUCH MORE FRIGHTENING THAN THAT SILLY GENERIC MONSTER DESIGN YOU SHAT OUT!!

but our movie is really

OH JUST FUCK OFF ALREADY!

Of all the things a movie about a witch-haunted woods must do, especially a movie which grounds itself materially in the documentation process, the provenance by which notice of this haunting is delivered or transmitted to the viewer, the recipient of this transmission, to be haunted itself and in turn to haunt the viewer is the most vital, most important task of such a movie. For what are movies but hauntings themselves? A spectral emanating from the past which attaches itself to a viewer, binds itself and becomes part of. If such a movie is constructed as to resist its own propensity to haunt, and instead is actively cast aside, unhexed even during the viewing, it undoes itself, undoes the pact, the covenant, between the viewer and itself.

Next time my wife tries to get me to go camping, I’m just gonna show her this. Camping is unnatural, guys. If men were meant to camp, there wouldn’t be Blair Witches out in the woods making people stand in the corners of dilapidated houses.

Full review at ScreenCrush.

if the scariest thing about your movie is a fucking foot then we have a problem

TIFF 2016 Film #16 

I'm still shook. There must have been a hydraulics system in my chair because I was flying out of my chair left and right. Easily the most I've jumped out of my seat from a movie. Blair Witch has jump scares galore, so if that's not your thing I would avoid this!

This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

oh fuck off

can't think of a more shameless example of Hollywood taking a genuinely exciting, provocative, audaciously experimental work of art and using its name to sell an ugly, generic, self-referential piece of shit. The Blair Witch Project is one of the best and scariest films of all time and you'll see none of the reasons why in here. just a bunch of superficial "escalation" of that film's details (3 times the characters! 10 times the "scares"! 100 times the spooky stick figures!) and some truly disgusting refutations of its core tenets. there's an actual real physical monster in this movie and you see it full-on like 5 times. made me sick to my stomach. done talking about this thing. garbage garbage garbage.

Listen to our Blair Witch episode here!

The Black Hills Forest in Maryland is revisited in this follow-up to the iconic The Blair Witch Project back in 1999 which shook up the found-footage genre. Once again a group of college kids venture out into the darkness, this time looking to find Heather Donahue who disappeared in the first film. She is the brother of one of the group and is believed to still be alive having apparently appeared on a YouTube video taken since. What ensues is a uninspired retread of the original, however it should be noted that the ending is worth holding on for as we get a glimpse of the infamous Blair Witch.

mds pq insistem em criar continuação pra isso? vou fingir que só o primeiro de 1999 existe

Some interesting points about the passing of time in the forest, but for the most part it’s a dud.

I was able to catch this at an advance screening and I absolutely loved it.. I love the original two films, and I think this was an excellent addition to the mythology. It's well made, it's creepy, it's LOADED with Easter eggs and callbacks to the first film. I would watch 10 more Blair Witch movies so come on and make them already!!

The Blair-ish Project

The Blah Witch Project

Bland Witch

That's all I got, sorry ya'll.

Got good in the second part but coudn't care for the characters and the ending was just a lot of running and the house part was rather boring.

Blair Witch 2016 is a fun, sequel to the original Blair Witch while expanding slightly on its mythos. The camera work is extremely shakey but adds to the dread of the film. May not be everyone's cup of tea but I enjoyed it. 3.5/5 stamps. 📬📬📬📫 first class!

Hoopla digital.

If you have saw the original this is more of an updated remake, if not it’s a fairly decent movie with the plot being fed to you as you go along. Although as with found footage movies they tend to be very jumpy, interference and lots of white noise maybe not for those with sensory overload issues. I enjoyed it but it just had me thinking back to the original and the brilliant marketing that went along with it. 

But if you are a Blair newbie and like this found footage genre it’s well worth a watch.

Eh sequel but still pretty good I guess

Ultimately flawed but has some good ideas and moments here and there in terms of franchiseyness