2017 Directed by Maxim Ford
In an early 20th century village, a painter with an unusual commission finds two pretty girls two model for him. The girls slowly come of age while exploring their sexuality and finding liberation in a repressed society.
Im Reich der Nymphen, תמונה של יופי, 여신의 그림, Idealne modelki, Картина красоты, Зображення краси, Kiệt Tác Của Vẻ Đẹp, 美丽的图画
The best way to describe this is if two amateur filmmakers who were freshmen in film school wanted to team up to make an Ingmar Bergman-like erotic period drama with the inspirations being the extensive sex scenes of Blue is the Warmest Color, the style of Dogme 95, the queer feminism of Portrait of a Lady on Fire(?), and access to Hungarian royalty free music, except the amateur filmmakers were Tommy Wiseau and Neil Breen and they were HORNY! Even then that sounds more coherent than what the fuck I've just seen!
73 minutes of boring, pretentious bullshit that thinks it's artistic, when it's just porn. It really doesn't help that most of the runtime features slo-mo that DRRAAGGGSS out the movie. The unsimulated sex, fine, save for one that's rape (lead female character rides her sleeping husband), yikes!
Unsurprisingly, the performances are lifelessly atrocious, there isn't much of a plot to be found, and the presentation is cheap-looking, save for a few nature shots.
Day 9: Picture of Beauty
Average Score: 1.74/5
Alright, I actually saw this Sunday morning, but it took me a while to write my review since there was so much to unpack that it took 1800 words to write this review.
That said, holy fucking shit... Where do I even fucking begin with this magical gem of a film?
Okay, so I was honestly expecting a really boring, pretentious film with the budget of $2 based on the poster. But I picked it for the 2.0 or Below marathon because the premise was described as being centered around an artist doing a commissioned painting and finds 2 women to model for it that, as you can…
This is legitimately one of the worst films i have ever seen.
It's not good enough to be studied in any great detail and it's not bad enough to be a porn. It's just bad.
It goes nowhere, characters randomly appear and disappear, and the performances are just dogshit, and that's being harsh to dogshit.
I've never before skipped through a movie just to get to the end. I will not be using this for my book.
