The truth is that there shouldn't be disappointment. I should, by no means, feel disappointed. But, leaving the theater I was confronted with this completely overwhelming feeling of utter tiredness and sadness. After seeing the movie I was messaging one of my friends who asked why it's so poor and why I disliked it so much and my exact words were, "t's more MCU garbage but this time it's Spider-Man and it feels fucking personal". That big, fat 94% on Rotten Tomatoes, the incredibly positive consensus on social media, it just proves that Marvel has won, they've won over everyone, critics and audiences alike, with their openly corporatized, overly-produced piece of modern-era junk. It proves that, for the time being,…

A John Hughes-esque coming-of-age movie, disguised as a friendly neighborhood adventure from the MCU; Spider-Man: Homecoming is more about growing up, and less about saving the world. 

With no loyalties to the Peter Parker role, I'm cool with Tom Holland. His Spidey is different, and in a way, refreshing. I like how the origin story is skipped, and instead, we dive head into the day-to-day adventures of a semi-awkward, fifteen-year-old. I'm more interested in the growth of Peter Parker, than the development of Holland's Spider-Man Spidey-Powers. I'm still undecided about the way Spidey looks in his costume. To me, he looks more like a CGI goofnut, than an Avenger. But, how many kids get to have Jennifer Connelly on standby,…

When you cut through all of the spandex and special effects, superhero movies are really just high school movies with bigger muscles, bigger budgets, and bigger constraints. Indeed, the best moments in the giddy, fitfully entertaining “Spider-Man: Homecoming” are the ones that gleefully conflate the likes of Stan Lee and John Hughes, delighting in the extent to which both of their signature genres tend to revolve around emotionally unsure young people who are struggling to juggle their double lives.

“Homecoming” takes Peter Parker all the way back to his sophomore year, (re)re-introducing the endlessly rebootable web-slinger (a wide-eyed and overeager Tom Holland) as a 15-year-old pipsqueak who splits his time between anchoring the the academic decathlon team and auditioning to…

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Some mumbo-jumbo:

- Listen, I know having Spider-Man back with Marvel is a big deal and all, but if he's just being pushed into a corner with crayons while Robert Downey Jr. and his loud Avenger friends go off and fight the big battle toys, why not leave them out of the world of the friendly neighborhood arachnid entirely?

- To simplify: This is "technically" a Spider-Man movie, and Spider-Man is in most of it. That's nice at least, and Tom Holland is still a vibrant splash-page of joy in terms of charisma.

- Action fails, comedy and characterization soars. It's upsetting to see how weightless and artificial the movement is in all of the superhero beats. A lot…