Imagine if “Gone Girl” had been developed as a toothless network television pilot — if it had been stripped of its subversive approach to gender dynamics, bludgeoned free of its sadistic gallows humor and shot like a very special episode of “NCIS: Suburbia.” Imagine if it hadn’t been directed by a filmmaker who’s drawn to trash the way that most people are to perfume, someone who genuinely believes you can learn as much about marriage and misogyny from the novels sold at an airport bookstore as you can from those taught in a college classroom. Imagine instead that it had been directed by the guy who made “The Help.”

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me: hoe don't do it
me: *points out every single slight similarity to gone girl (2014) nonstop throughout the entire movie*
me: oh my god

emily blunt metaphorically smacked me across the face with an ARRICAM lite and by the time the credits were rolling i had to be scraped off the movie theater carpet with a large spatula

wow emily's life really went off the rails after she didn't get to go on the paris trip

ms. emily: individually removed each hair on my goddamn head with a pair of tiny tweezers

ms. the rest of this movie: put them all back

the girl sure was...on the train

listen i love you emily blunt. i would die for you. but please put on some chapstick... I'm so concerned

all i got from this movie is that emily blunt is a legend and men are terrible

the movie, objectively: not great 
emily blunt and allison janney, objectively: could murder me and I'd thank them

I got a kick out of Emily Blunt: Blackout Drunk Detective, but a movie this absurd and convoluted and filled with silly coincidence has absolutely no business being so fucking serious.

the best lifetime movie i've ever seen

i want ms. emily blunt to know that it's ok to run me over with a train, killing me instantly

FUCK YOU shit movie i couldve watched fifty shades instead of this bc holy fuck whgy so much sex also rachel is a girlboss

This was actually good which the reviews didn’t prepare me for

me yelling to the tv screen “prettiest girl in the world!” and it’s emily blunt as rachel watson hungover, with smeared makeup and all covered in blood

this movie was not as bad as i remembered… it was still not what it could have been tho
emily blunt ily
it was so obviously oscar bait that it ruined it.. especially jennifer lawrence’s tethered like she pisses me OFF

Nach 15 Minuten war ich kurz davor aufzugeben, weil ich in fast jeder Szene und bei fast jeder Figur überlegen musste, wer das nochmal war. Ich weiß, dass es Teil der Handlung ist, dass sich die Figuren von Rebecca Ferguson und Haley Bennett ähnlich sehen, mich hat es aber zur Verzweiflung gebracht. Im Übrigen hatte ich bei den männlichen Figuren ähnliche Probleme mir zu merken wer nochmal wer war, es war einfach nur anstrengend.
Nach einiger Zeit (und nachdem eine der Figuren verschwunden ist) wird es dann aber besser und es entfaltet sich ein durchaus interessanter Mystery-plot, der es aber verpasst rechtzeitig abzubiegen und für meinen Geschmack etwas zu lange herummäandert und etwas zu kompliziert und verklausuliert sein will.
Einige exzellente Performances (Alter, spielt Emily Blunt hier gut) und ein gutes Ende (auch wenn sich der Twist etwas früh abzeichnet) sorgen dann aber dafür, dass ich den Film am Ende dann doch ziemlich gut fand.

(watched 14.6.2021) I had pretty low expectations for this so I was pleasantly surprised. No, it wasn't brilliant but I did enjoy it. There is a lot that could be improved. Emily Blunt was fantastic in this!

The ending really surprised me! That's always a good thing on a murder mystery. The story was a bit slow at times but I think it worked out in the end.

Dislikes: odd pacing, at least in my mind
Best qualities: I was seriously impressed by Emily Blunt's facial expressions, like I got startled a few times by her drunk eyes lmao

Shot well, but that's about it. The story is so far-fetched and unbelievable, which just about destroys the whole enjoyment factor and reduces this film to an "it could have been so much better." Theroux, Blunt, and Evans all do fine, though. The direction feels all over the place, and the editing is only fine. Maybe better to just read the book.

Her ex husband is a son of a bitch

me he pasado un buen rato confundida, otro tanto odiando a absolutamente todos los personajes por estar construidos de forma tan superficial y otro tanto pensando como esto se podría haber resumido bastante más y había bastante trama de relleno aprobada por el plotwist

That girl do be on da train

Fun to watch but was not as good as the book

the book was really really good and except for the confusion with the timelines i thought the movie mostly held up, emily deserved all the awards for this performance !