Y'know, I sat here for a while trying to think how I could include some pun about this movie waffling, but it just doesn't work. Why? Because this movie doesn't waffle. It sticks relatively fastidiously to one method and genre of storytelling. Unfortunately, it does so in a completely uninspired way.
Nor can I fairly make a pun describing it as syrupy sweet since it--somewhat admirably--doesn't plumb the depths of its story for every last morsel of saccharine, emotional pandering it might have.
However, the waffle's arch-rival provides an apt comparison. This movie walked right out the third-story window where its screenwriters met and pancaked. Hard. It fell flat. This movie almost stands out for being so unexemplary.