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  • Prescription Thugs

    Prescription Thugs

    Why are the sickest, most unhealthy people I know always the most medicated?

    "They need the drugs because they're unwell, dumbass!", I hear you say.

    To that, I say, "Well, if they're taking all those pills, why aren't they getting better? Isn't that the entire fucking point of taking a pill - so you're not unwell anymore?"

    This is why horror movies aren't scary anymore. No ghost or monster or creature can compete with the abomination that is the Unites…

  • Get Out

    Get Out

    ★★★★

    Finally, a movie that understands the absurdly thin line between horror and comedy.

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  • The Dark Knight Rises

    The Dark Knight Rises

    ½

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    He did it. He actually did it.

    I cannot believe I'm even typing this, but it's true...

    Christopher Nolan successfully crammed 10 pounds of shit into a 5 pound bag.

    Didn't even think it was possible!

    Is every citizen of Gotham City a fucking idiot? Let me count the ways...

    The first example goes all the way back to Batman Begins, when Bruce Wayne disappears for something like 8 years, then comes back one day without anybody asking where he…

  • The Godfather

    The Godfather

    ★★★★★

    I don't trust anyone who dislikes this movie.