The Matrix Resurrections

The Matrix Resurrections ★★★★½

To the Boy Who Fell in Love with The Matrix at 14

Who saw, in those opening minutes,
Trinity leap an impossible distance
And wanted to fly

Who did not make the first jump
But kept leaping regardless
Because staying tethered
To the building he was stranded on
Was far more agony
Than falling to the ground
Time and time again

Who, despite feeling incapable
Of ever finding another
Who would love him,
Entirely for who you are,
(And with how low he kept himself,
How could he ever imagine
Another who would be that inviting,
Passionate, and caring
About him in all the depths
He submerged
His mind and body in)

Who watches, with awe,
A proclamation of love
Bring a body riddled with bullets
Back to life in one moment,
A divine hand of love
Reaching down
And restarting a heart in another,
And who wishes
To find another
With whom he can one day
Exchange a love
That potent,

I write this to you
Because I have been you
In an earlier life

I know how hopeless it seems where you are,
Spending endless nights
Staring at the screens before you
And using them—
Pretending to be someone you were not,
Typing out questions you would just as soon erase—
To wish you were more,
You were different,

I know how easily
You are rendered immobile
By choice,
By the fears shooting through your mind,
Endlessly, infinitely,
Worrying that the path you’ve wanted
More than anything else
Is more trouble than it’s worth—
Mired with struggles,
Too distressing to fathom weathering—
Or that there will one day
Come a time
When you suddenly regret
Pushing forward
Past a point of no return—
A regret that cannot exist
When you have felt this
So deep within you
For as long as you could consciously feel

Though your journey to get the life you want
Will be long,
Marred by setbacks,
Beset by blockades,
One you will have to fight for
Time and time again
You will find the life you know you want,
You will find the one you always hoped you would love,
In the way you dreamed you could love
And you will know,
The second you feel her hand in yours,
That there is something about her,
That there is something about this life
That feels more right than anything
You were ever told you were destined for

Because this life isn't fate,
And this love isn't fate—
You live and you love
Because you choose to

And you find, now,
Finally confident in this choice,
That you choose to make it
Every day

You choose to live,
You choose to love,
And your life finally feels
Like The One you always wanted to be—
That girl
Flying an impossible distance
Breaking the boundaries
Of what you were programmed to do

It is in choosing
That you find
You’re beginning to believe

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