Empire Records

Empire Records ★★★★★

Happy Rex Manning Day!

What makes this the greatest soundtrack of all time is not the catchiness of the songs (they're very catchy), the appropriateness of them to the film (they fit perfectly), or the way they are a mix of diegetic and and not (it's beautifully woven in). It's not even because of how they feel sincere, feel like they weren't crafted entirely as a corporate tie-in or product placement, but rather as an artful attempt to evoke an era, an energy, a spirit of outsiderness, a shared experience between these misfits and losers. It's not even because they are a perfect distillation of 90s indie rock you've mostly never heard of before or after this film mixed with a few pop hits.

It's because GWAR has Mark eaten whole by a monster in the middle of Mark's hallucination.

Previously, I wrote up a "Which Empire Records character are you?" guide. This time, I am doing a "Which Empire Records song are you?" Not all songs will be represented.

1. The Cruel Sea, "The Honeymoon Is Over"
* Starts things off gently
* Knows everyone's name
* Kicks your ass out

2. The Dirt Clods, "Can't Stop Losing Myself"
* Breaking all the rules
* Bold and courageous
* Identity crisis

3. Ape Hangers, "I Don't Wanna Live Today"
* Takes risks
* Over-confident
* Suicidal ideation, but in an upbeat way

4. Gin Blossoms, "Till I Hear It From You"
* Hopelessly romantic
* But also a bit sexy
* And naive

5. Queen Sarah Saturday, "Seems"
* Loving yourself
* Knows how to make mundane tasks a good time
* Everyone is excited about you

6. Rex Manning, "Say No More (Mon Amour)"
* Obnoxious
* Presumptuous
* Sticks around long after you're done with them

7. The Martinis, "Free"
* Just want to have a little bit of control over something
* In a bad spot emotionally
* Transient

8. Suicidal Tendencies, "I Shot the Devil"
* Makes everyone around you crazy
* Angry all the time
* Often cut short

9.. Flying Lizards, "Money (It's What I Want)"
* Mocking
* And shallow
* But also insightful

10. The Buggles, "Video Killed the Radio Star"
* Aware of how things are changing
* Nostalgic
* The fucker deserved it, though

11. The Meices, "Ready Steady Go"
* A lot of energy
* Cunning
* But kinda a bootlicker

12. Quicksand, "Thorn in My Side"
* Sexy and seductive
* Exhibitionist
* Irritated

13. Ass Ponies, "Little Bastard"
* Snotty little bastard
* Aspiring lumpenproletariat
* Misunderstood

14. AC/DC, "If You Want Blood (You've Got It)"
* Just has to let it all out sometimes
* Not so much angry as furious
* A little horny

15. Evan Dando, "The Ballad of El Goodo"
* Beautiful but sad
* Compassionate but awkward
* Quietly defiant

16. Throwing Muses, "Snakeface"
* Has an agenda, and that agenda is sex
* But also lunch
* From all over, really

17. Dire Straits, "Romeo and Juliet"
* Romantic, but doomed
* Overthinks things
* Knows their history, but keeps things in the present

18. The Cranberries, "How"
* In over their head
* Not in a good place to hear something emotional right now
* Irish

19. Edwyn Collins, "A Girl Like You"
* Like other girls
* Betrays their good friends
* Right about people's underwear

20. The Cranberries, "Liar"
* Knows who you are, on a deeper level
* Very cutting
* Also Irish

21. Fitz of Depression, "Power Shack"
* Just fucking loses it
* Depressed
* Emotionally unstable, at least at the moment

22. GWAR, "Saddam A Go-Go"
* High as fuck
* Deeply inappropriate
* Pretty stupid

23. Adolescents, "L.A. Girl"
* Shooting blanks
* Really just wants to belong
* Doesn't know how to handle his anger

24. Sponge, "Plowed"
* Scheming for a good cause
* Exhausted but hard-working
* Brings in a miracle or two

25. Coyote Shivers, "Sugarhigh"
* Not the person you thought she was
* Brings the best out in people
* Above it all, in a good way

26. The The, "Today Is the Day"
* A good time is had by all around them
* Redundant in some ways
* Comes through when you really need them

Comment with your answers.

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