Favorite films

  • Stalker
  • Chinatown
  • Harakiri
  • McCabe & Mrs. Miller

Recent activity

  • Mission: Impossible - Fallout


  • Death on the Nile

  • Wait Until Dark


  • The Northman


Recent reviews

  • Mission: Impossible - Fallout

    Mission: Impossible - Fallout


    The trailer for Dead Reckoning made me do this.

    Halo jump, bathroom fight, convoy breakout, motorcycle chase, car chase, subterranean quadruple fake-out, foot chase, helicopter duel…WHEW. Fallout still rocks.

  • Death on the Nile

    Death on the Nile

    My slim hopes that Death on the Nile would be more entertaining than its forebear were soundly shattered when the opening black & white WWI sequence turned out to be little more than a melodramatic origin story for why Poirot has a funny mustache. For there, we further devolve. At least the black and white helped mask some of the worst cgi composite backgrounds I’ve seen in recent memory. The film constantly wants you to gawk at the splendor of the…

Popular reviews

  • A Christmas Story Live!

    A Christmas Story Live!

    “Hey what if we turned A Christmas Story into an extended Old Navy commercial? Like really *really* extended.”


  • The Lighthouse

    The Lighthouse


    31 Days of Horror #19

    This was extremely my shit, which is why it bugs me a little that the narrative structure of the thing was a bit of a let down amidst all the absolutely amazing cinematography, sound design, and bits of sea-faring dialogue (including a monumental Melvillian monologue precipitated by an insult to one’s cooking skills). The rub is that the movie is about two men going mad together, but they both start out at like an 8…