The Irishman

The Irishman ★★★★★

I spent an entire Chicago summer playing Pokémon Go. No not like you Michael or Sarah, who downloaded at brunch and played that afternoon and bragged about it at work only on Monday. I dedicated, at the very least, 200 hours trying to collect all of generation one.

But I couldn’t do it. There were three regional Pokémon that you could only collect if you were in Europe, Asia, or Australia. So I never got them. Mr. Mime. Farfetch’d, Kanghaskhan.

And sure, I could visit those countries and catch these three days, months or years from now../but the thrill is gone. The only feeling left is the pang of failure. A lifelong pang.

Anyway, nursing home Irishman thinks he’s got it bad. Walk a mile in someone else’s shoes, specifically the Nike Free Runs I purchased after blistering my feet July 2015 tryna catch one or two Dragonairs.

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