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  • Beauty and the Beast

    Beauty and the Beast

    ★★★½

    Luke Evans gave this everything. A perfect Disney villain.

    Now I want to see the romantic musical comedy that pits Luke Evans' Gaston and Chris Pine's "Prince Charming" in a battle for each other's hearts.

  • Rogue One: A Star Wars Story

    Rogue One: A Star Wars Story

    ★★★★

    There's a moment early on when Ben Mendelsohn's accent slips, just a little, as he says "We were thees close!" and it's everything.

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  • Kingsman: The Secret Service

    Kingsman: The Secret Service

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    Aside from the yawnful Good-Guys-White / Bad-Guys-Other-Colours casting, this was a surprisingly enjoyable action flick... until it fucked out in the third act.

    It was partly the utterly weird special effects. Partly that they sent their only lady-spy off into space 'cos no plot for her. But mostly because of a series of gags right near the end in which the only moral (blonde, beautiful) hold-out amongst the captured guests offers our hero ass-sex if he sets her free.

    Don't…

  • Paddington

    Paddington

    ★★★★★

    I just couldn't find anything wrong with this. And now I'm off to make some marmalade.