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  • Jurassic World

    Jurassic World

    ½

    An imitation crocodile-skin handbag that reeks of chemical treatment and color that won't stop rubbing off on your hands and clothes. Yet somehow it costs more than the real thing.

  • Black Mass

    Black Mass

    ½

    Early on in the film a bunch of gangsters are hanging out in a car and one of them starts to tell a story about how he heard porn stars in Los Angeles eat a bunch of celery right before they perform. He gets interrupted and never explains why they do this. I was more interested in hearing the end of that story than anything that happened over the next 100 minutes of movie.